Uncomfortable

This weekend we went to one of my “sister-in-love’s” homes for a birthday party. I’ve never been uncomfortable being the only white girl in the room, because I usually am. When we walked in, Boo’s oldest sister, mom, and dad were sitting together. I said hello to his sister, (of the three we are the least close) gave his dad a smooch and hugged his mom. We went to find his sister who’s home we were in and say hello to her.

We were sitting conversing with everyone when it became apparent that the sister that was by his parents was not wanting to be a part of our conversations. We’ll call her M. We were sitting across the room from them and while they were talking to us, M didn’t hardly bat an eye. Throughtout the evening Boo would say something and she’d acknowledge him but that was about it.

His third sister came in later, she and I are the closest. I went into where she was and talked to her for a bit. As we were getting ready to leave, I heard Boo saying to M that she needed to give me a chance. “Talk to her please M.” Then he called me over to tell me the same thing. We needed to get to know each other because he’s in love with me, etc. She told me finally to find her on FB and request her as my friend.

As we were driving home I told him that he made me a bit uncomfortable doing that right in front of both of us. Because neither of us really know how to react. “Uncomfortable!? How were you uncomfortable, how can you tell me that when YOUR parents are the ones that walked away from me and wouldn’t give me the time of day, and you want to tell me that little conversation made you uncomfortable?” He wasn’t very happy with me, but I knew right then and there that what I was feeling, he felt ten fold last May when my parents were here. He’s then told me that he’d talked to M and that she was going to give me a chance, because he asked her to do it for him. Now, if only my parents would do the same.

I know now the pain of feeling “unwanted”. It’s a feeling I don’t ever want to deal with again. We get the occassional looks and comments, but not being accepted by a family member hurts. And, as he told me, that’s just my sister, I have to contend with your parents. And to that, I need to tell him, I am sorry Boo!

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~ by tia0220 on March 29, 2010.

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